I was FREE! I didn’t know I was bound until I realized I was free.
Last weekend, I stepped into a room filled with 800+ writers, speakers and leaders from all across the country. We were all there for a common purpose—to develop our craft, learn from accomplished writers, speakers & leaders and to take our next steps in our journey.
Before I walked in, I checked my bag to make sure I had all my necessary items for the day, grabbed my coffee and walked in all by myself.
As I approached the registration table, I passed a handful of girls who were there alone, too. We exchanged smiles and even a gentle, hello.
Registration was easy peasy and took all of two minutes to get my conference tote.
There were a ton of cute photo ops-including a blue, velvet couch that had all the feels.
Since I was there alone, I glanced over and found another girl who I knew was eyeing that velvet chair too and gave her the, “Do you want to take pics for each other?” look.
She understood. We swapped photos. We chatted. We laughed. We became friends.
Before the day got underway, I snuck into the prayer room to gather my thoughts and as I sat there it dawned on me—I was FREE!
Why wasn’t I freaking out? Why wasn’t I insecure? Why wasn’t I feeling the normal feelings I have experienced in settings like this?
I’ve been to dozens of Church conferences, most of the time feeling a little out of place… sometimes a lot out of place. I’ve sat in a room with pastors, leaders and influencers before with my brave smile and anxious heart.
One time in particular when I attended a conference for church planters—as I went to grab my seat, I was redirected to the balcony seats because the seats up close were only for the churches a part of this organization. I know it wasn’t meant to make me feel left out, but it sure made me feel that way.
You see, my husband and I wanted to be a part of this organization so badly. It was our dream, but the feeling wasn’t mutual. And as life-giving as they tried to be, it felt like rejection.
I didn’t realize it then, but standing on the other side of this FREEDOM I recognize that it was in that moment when I allowed a closed door to define me.
Something shifted in my heart and I began to approach God differently. No longer believing God to be more than enough, I started to believe the lie that there wasn’t room for me.
That was almost 7 years ago. I’ve walked through a lot since then—closed doors and victories. I’ve been journeying back to a place where I belong… a seat at His table as His daughter.
For the first time in a long time, I was FREE. I was free from believing the lie that God has a limited supply.
The days leading up to this conference, I was reading through Romans. It said, “Abraham was FULLY CONVINCED that God was able to fulfill His promise.”
In a room that should have made me feel the most insecure, I never felt more at home!
I belonged here.
There was room for me.
Not because of me, but because I am FULLY CONVINCED that God is able to fulfill His promises to me. I am FULLY CONVINCED that the Author and Finisher of my faith is a beautiful story teller and I am FULLY CONVINCED He wants to tell a great story through my life. A story that displays His goodness.
The enemy of our lives wants to convince us of everything opposite of that truth. He wants us to approach God as though our God is of limited supply.
But He is the God of more than enough! And no matter what you might think right now, there’s room for you too, sister!
We are His daughters and we do not need to compare our life to anyone else’s nor do we need to compete for what belongs to us.
Even when we experience rejection and redirected to sit in the stands by others, we are not sidelined by God.
Looking back, I am so grateful that God allowed me to experience rejection from people. It’s been a gift to truly understanding the depth of a divine invitation from The King of Kings.
I thought I was pushed to the side, but it was God positioning me—Positioning me for His purpose.
He’s doing the same for you. No, not writing the same story, but He is writing your unique story. A story that doesn’t look or sound like anyone else’s.
Don’t waste another day believing anything else.
There’s room for you!
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